How to deal with negative thoughts

Hi everyone,

I'm constantly engaged in the joy of helping people process their thought patterns and start harnessing the power of their minds for intentional, purposeful joy so I thought I'd share these learnings with you.

Think you’re on your own or couldn't possibly admit to that?

That’s a big mistake, it takes real courage to admit, and if it's true for you, realise that it's more common that you think.

You want to feel more positive, but generally you feel like you often put on a show that you’re in control and strong, while inside the biggest critic is at work, and you struggle to break the effect of negative thinking patterns when you go there?

It's not the critic who counts

I include the internal critic in this great quote!

Maybe you’ve learned that it’s weak to admit to something like this – again big mistake!

The most courageous and effective leaders in the military and life demonstrate courage and humility by sharing their challenges with others, it's how they grow individually and together.

If you can relate to this, let me shed some light on what might be happening in this situation and how you can change it more quickly than you realise

There are many reasons why you may think ‘glass half empty’, write yourself off before you even start, and generally struggle to believe yourself or feel the effect of your attempts to think positively.

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This is the tangled web of your mind and based on many experiences in your life from many sources, however, in this article I’m going to show you how to actually change that.

Why you think like this is not as important as doing something to change the way you’re thinking.

Think of it like this, if I was on the other side of a deep ravine and I had a bow and arrow and I kept shooting my arrows into your arm (which hurts you!). There’s no way you can get to me or stop me from doing what I’m doing, you’ve tried shouting at me and I give no response (and you have no weapons to get me either!).

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What’s the priority to you, finding out why I’m shooting you in the arm or stop the arrows hitting you?

What we need to do is break the pattern of the arrows (thoughts) continuously hitting you and that means you must interrupt the flow.

The most powerful way is to process the thoughts properly by exposing how ridiculous, unhelpful and usually untrue they are, and over a surprisingly short period of time, transform the pattern of thinking.

Action point

Write down the following questions on an index card (actually do this now) and carry it around with you, place one in all of the places you mostly spend your time such as in your phone case, your diary cover, your desk and your pocket so you actually use it…

The next time you enter into negative thinking ask yourself these pattern interrupt questions and you’ll start to create a transformative effect. Here's a 2 min you tube explanation of these questions.

Pattern interrupt questions

Try it on a limiting thought you've had now

  • Does this thinking help me grow, learn or develop in some way?
  • Do I enjoy the way I feel from these thoughts?
  • Is there actual evidence to prove that what I think is true, which is verifiable to an objective observer?
  • Do I have a choice to think something different?
  • What new options could I generate and act on?

What did you realise?

If you think this won’t work for you, my question to you is - how do you know? Have you tried it consistently?

The truth is, if you haven’t committed to actually practicing with these questions and processing your thoughts in this way before, for at least a week of committed practice, you don’t know anything about it, you just think you do.

I however, have the benefit of seeing many people who had identified as ‘negative’, change their minds very quickly with great delight and surprise.

Here's one from this week

I'm finding I'm happier and so are my family. This makes me feel good, gives me more energy and focus, which is projected into my work. I'm now finding I'm hitting these hard and head on and it feels great. 

In addition, they are often shocked that a few days into this practice, they are naturally thinking and feeling more positive and not needing the card any more.

They have created new, more accurate and healthier patterns of thinking, will you?

These are the rules. They work.

I’d love to know what you think - let me know in the comments.

If you're interested in positive psychology, mindset and growth, why not benefit from my coaching by joining our tribe of people from around the world, from the military, business and sport our High Performance Leadership Monthly Mastermind.

I go deep into powerful new frameworks and practices you can use to keep your focus on developing yourself, and if you can't make the live calls you've got access to the members area of all the live calls and worksheets right now!

Head over to the link and find out more about our amazing group of leaders striving for high performance in our High Performance Leadership Mastermind Community and discover your actual amazing potential with some amazing people.

Thanks for reading, I hope this serves you and that you have an amazing day, on purpose!

Lee.

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